The Top-5 Things That Drive Me Nuts About The Opposite Sex

Women do a lot of things to drive men up the wall. Just ask my girlfriend. Sometimes, I think she does it purposely to get under my skin. Now, I do love my girlfriend to death and I would go out to the ends of the earth for her, from dragging me to see stupid chick flicks to never making up her mind, there are a bunch of things that drive me crazy about her and about women in general. 1. Men are always wrong. First thing’s first, men are never right, so just get over it. Women always like to say that men never stop and ask for directions when they might be lost and that men like to figure things out on their own. Nine times out of ten it doesn’t work in our favor. Well, it’s the truth. Men are never right. No matter how right we think we are at certain things, the fact of the matter is that the woman always has the last laugh. Even when we know we are wrong, women always like to crush our spirits with a devastating low blow. For example, when you don’t stop and ask for directions and you do end up getting lost; leave it to the woman to chip in with, “I told you we should have stopped at that gas station and asked.” 2. Morning Routines.Women take forever at getting ready in the morning. What in the heck takes them so long? I have never understood that. Here is my morning routine: I generally sleep through the first alarm, then by the second I am up and I get in the shower. After getting out of the shower, I brush my teeth and throw on some clothes and am ready to walk out the door. Now here is a woman’s morning routine: wake up, look on Facebook and talk on AIM forabout an hour, then take about a 20 minute shower that takes all the hot water, get out, dry their hair, brush their hair, straighten their hair, put on clothes, re-brush hair, apply the many things of makeup that they have, change shirts because they change their mind, re-brush hair, add more makeup, find a pair of the 1 million shoes that they have to go with their outfit; and when they can’t find any that match, they change again, re-brush hair, etc. This list can go on for days and days. 3. When a woman says they’re fine, then usually it means something is wrong!What’s up with that? Why can’t you just say, “You have made me so mad; you are a jerk and I don’t understand why you act like that,” or something? Why is it that when women are upset and a man asks them what their deal is, they shrug it off and pretend that nothing is wrong? When men say certain women are hard to read, this is why. You know it takes men forever to figure out most things, but knowing when a woman is upset is not one of them. We can read women like books, and we know when something is wrong with a woman. But, when they won’t tell us what it is that they are upset about, or what it is that the man did wrong; then we have to start figuring out what it is that we did to tick her off and that’s the hard part.4. MAKE UP YOUR MIND!!! When going out on a date, the man always wants to make the woman happy by showing her a good time. Dinner and a movie is the good old classic cliché date that men and women go on. But why is it that when men ask where a woman wants to go for dinner, they respond with, “I don’t know what I am in the mood for. Just go where ever you want.” So, as all men should, you listen to her, and pull into the Wendy’s Parking lot and she looks at you saying, “I don’t want fast food.” You shake your head in disbelief and keep driving. You finally pull into the Mexican restaurant and she looks at you like you are nuts and says, “I don’t really feel like Mexican tonight.” You finally decide to ask her, “Well, where do you want to go?” She shrugs her shoulders and says, “Let’s just eat popcorn and stuff at the movie, that’ll fill me up.” Great. This would have been good to know when we first made plans. Now what do we do for an hour and a half until the movie starts? 5. Why do women always want to see chick flicks? When men and women go on dates to the movies, men want to see people’s heads getting ripped off, blood, gore, action, and other things like that. Women, on the other hand, want to see the dumb lovey-dovey, man and woman break up just to get back together at the end, always have a happy ending type films. All chick-flicks are about the same exact thing, and end the same exact way, but for some reason I’d say about 92% of women in love them. And of course, to avoid upsetting them, most men conform to see what it is that they’re lady wants to see. No matter what, women get what they want, and if they want to see, “The Nanny Diaries,” then they will and guess what, you’re going with them.

These are just five of the many things that women do that drive me nuts. I don’t understand it and I never will. I don’t understand why women take forever in the morning, why they can never make up their mind, and why they always want to see chick flicks. I think some of these things have plagued and will continue to plague mankind about the opposite sex for many years to come.