Freshman Fifteen, Pound 8


Last semester, everyone from students to faculty and staff went hog wild over the Swine Flu (yes, pun intended). It was all people talked about, and the freshmen were in a titter as the count of the sick increased every day.
“Where have our parents dumped us off at?” they wondered with fear. Eventually, “getting the swine” became old news, and those who were sick faded into yesterday’s gossip. The flu abated thankfully and students went back to classes.
            Nowadays, there is a new sickness. I call it “The Catamount Flu.” It hits right around Midterm Break and no one gets any better until Spring Break. You may have Catamount Flu if you:
~ Have aches and pains upon attending class
~ Reading six chapters a night gives you a headache
~ Experience exhaustion after two or more back-to-back classes
~ Have stopped attending special functions you normally would have attended
~ Have discovered the walk to the dining hall is far too long and now eat only Pop Tarts, popcorn, and the questionable-looking yogurt in the mini fridge
            Symptoms may be temporarily relieved by missing a class or procrastinating/not completing an assignment. Full recovery will only be acquired upon release for Spring Break, please contact your physician if this is bothersome.
            There is no magic pill to sleep through March (though I do suggest Wonka’s Pixy Stix and a good movie, which are my indulgences). Instead, you have to roll with the punches, take a few hits for the team, and all those other cliché phrases saying to perk up and deal with it.
Spring Break is on the horizon, and after that it won’t be long before a new batch of Catamounts will no longer be little kittens, but the strong cats of the future, taking on the world in either graduate school or the profession of their choice for a whole different life.
The rest of us will have to say goodbye to beloved friends and/or significant others as we travel back to the places we crawled out from, the little towns or big cities that cannot be compared to bitty Cullowhee and old-fashioned Sylva.
So, while you may feel sick with this Catamount Flu, enjoy the time you have, do as many crazy but safe adventures with your friends as you can manage, and don’t let the flu get you or your grades down!